14 lies you tell yourself before going out

Beware of number 5.

You’re tired, your wallet is as empty as the bottle of whiskey you drank in one go last week and you’re simply not in the mood for partying. No matter what, there’s no way you’re going out this weekend. And suddenly, there is that phone call from a friend ... Well, this time it will surely be different.

1. This time, I definitely won’t get wasted. And I won’t mix my drinks either (at least not beer and wine...).

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2. I will remember everything. Most likely.

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3. I won’t chat anyone up (If I wouldn’t touch him/her with a barge pole).

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4. I’ll be home by 1 am so that I can do something useful tomorrow.

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5. I will NOT call my ex!

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6. Things I won’t lose tonight: My keys, my purse, my dignity.

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7. Drunk dancing? Not tonight.

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8. When I wake up in the morning, there won’t be any random bruises, scratches or love bites on my body

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9. There are already so many calories in alcohol that I clearly won’t have any junk food at the end of the night.

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10. I won’t use my credit card to buy rounds for everyone else.

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11. I won’t fall asleep in my smelly clothes.

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12. I won’t smoke (never mind passive smoking).

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13. I won’t vomit.

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14. I won’t go home in secret.

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^{Picture Credit: Drunk woman on the bed with bottle in hand} ^{via Shutterstock}

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